Today was the first day of swim lessons with Lou. It was so much fun. We sang songs. We kicked towards rubber duckies. We jumped off the side of the pool. We went under water. I let go of Lou several times and let him figure out how to kick himself back up above...
Continue readingSometimes Hallelujah
Nothing is for sure. We can’t be certain of very many things in life. Plans change. People change. What worked today won’t work tomorrow. Someone gets cancer. Someone leaves. Life is chaos. We only think we have it all under control. But how can you control something so vast, so varied? Something that was...
Continue readingIf You’re Out There
Send me some advice and hope. And sleep. I’m raw each night. I’m exhausted each morning. I’m anxious. I’m not myself. I’m hopeful but unsure. What does the other side look like?...
Continue readingOurs
Your pain is my pain. We struggle together. We get by together. We have joy together. This journey we are on is ours and ours alone. When I see you hurt I want to take it away. When I see you smile I’m filled with joy. This will pass and we will be ok....
Continue readingNothing Works
It’s hard not to think you do everything wrong when nothing seems to work. The anxiety around nighttime routines, kids acting up in social situations, just generally not knowing what to do or why something is happening. Hard isn’t the right word. Scary. Demotivating. Stressful. When nothing seems to work what else can you...
Continue readingNailed It
Today was the first day of my parental leave. Hoorah! We took the boys to the zoo. I had nitro cold brew. I got some great yard work done. And I got to a point where I thought I should probably stop and go rest. But I saw some ivy creeping all up and...
Continue readingSome Likes
I’ve been posting some heavy stuff lately so I’m going to try something lighter. This is a list of things I like a lot: Gentleman Jack Nitro Cold Brew with sweet cream Grilled corn on the cob Ellenos yogurt – any flavor, it’s a miracle yogurt Texts from my friends Julian’s smiles Watching my...
Continue readingTrapped On A Plane
I’ll admit it. I had no empathy for parents with screaming children on planes before having kids. I thought I did but I’m guilty of the dirty looks and the sighs of annoyance. But I had no idea. No clue the stress the parents are under. The worry about other people getting pissed your...
Continue readingReluctant
Lately I’ve been writing somewhat surface level posts. It’s not for lack of ideas or deep thoughts. I’m just not sure I can be that intense right now. I’m so immersed in mourning the loss of my parents. And dealing with the long days of parenting. And trying to take care of my family....
Continue readingThe Love
I’m exhausted. It’s been a long day of funeral visiting hours and memorial services. And I need to go to sleep. But I feel the love. From my wonderful family. For my parents. For all of us. It’s been so great to spend time with the people who have seen me grow and grown...
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